I had signed up a couple weeks ago...
This hour of prayer, not in the comfort of my home, but on the street.
A street that balances an abortion clinic on one side and a Christian-run crisis pregnancy counselling center on the other. I was to be a little slice of obedience, pacing the sidewalk between them... praying.
The day before i was to go, my husband Curt decided to come with me and we asked Grampsie to watch the kids. I picked Curt up at his work and we went into the city together.
I remember watching a video last year that my sister had made of 40 days for life. One question she asked... and the answer that was given, has never left me. In the video, my sister pointed the camera at a little Catholic grandmother and asked the question, "Why is prayer so important?" The lady, without missing a beat, answered completely backward to what most people would say. "Because Prayer is how God speaks to us." (Don't we often think that prayer is how *we* speak to *God*?) I had to watch the video again and again. It was an amazing answer. Today, as we paced, that video played in my mind. I walked, and instead of my own words pouring out as they often do... God spoke. He spoke to me when, while walking away from Curt, our baby Eva, strapped to my back, called out, "DADDY! DADDY?" I spoke gently to her. "Eva, do you want Daddy? Is he going to come?" At that moment, an image of Jesus' face was impressed on me with the thought that the children being aborted across the street were His children. He was their Daddy. I prayed, "Come Lord Jesus."
Later, Eva decided she wanted Curt to hold her so i undid the backpack and Curt took her out and walked on ahead with her. I snapped the backpack up again and began walking in silence. It was then that God spoke to me. "You are a symbol of what goes on here." I walked in silence with my empty backpack... no heat from Eva's tiny body... just cold, empty wind. God wants me to see these children as my own as well... not just His.
When we had first arrived at the clinic, there was an older man in his 60's praying the rosary as he walked the length of the sidewalk. Every time we passed him, the words "Beautiful Catholic" flooded over me. The faithfulness of Catholics in particular choosing to be associated with this issue has encouraged me so much over the years. I want my faithfulness to be Beautiful too. Tonight, during Bible study with the kids, we discussed the verse in Micah.
New King James Version
8 He has shown you, O man, what is good;
And what does the Lord require of you
But to do justly,
To love mercy,
And to walk humbly with your God?
So much to learn... Come Lord Jesus.